Harryitis
by starstrucked
Summary: [WiP] Poor Harry. Getting lost in the Delta Quadrant and dying repeatedly is bad enough. But what happens when he gets dragged in the middle of the budding romance between his two best buddies?
1. Clarinet Practice

Harryitis

By starstruck

Author's Note:  Poor Harry.  He always gets into the bad situations.  But we love him anyway!

Disclaimer: Voyager & Harry Kim are property of Paramount.  Another reason to feel sorry for Harry.

**

            The absolute worst thing about having Tom Paris as your best friend was the way he just barged into your quarters uninvited.  It was disconcerting, the way he just invited himself over.  And Tom, being Tom, always chose the most inconvenient times to barge in.

            Like during Harry's clarinet practice, for example.  Tom didn't seem to understand the importance of practicing.  And he always made snide comments about how much cooler the saxophone was, and would attempt to subtly imply that the clarinet was beyond annoying.

            It just made the barging in that much worse.

            So when Tom walked in during Harry's clarinet practice for the day, it was all Harry could do not to groan aloud.  Luckily, Harry had remarkably good self-control, and he just ignored Tom.

            "Harry . . ." said Tom.

            Harry continued the Clarinet Concerto.

            "Harry . . ." said Tom again.

            "**What**, Tom?  Why did you come barging into **my **quarters **this **time?" asked Harry.

            Okay, so patience wasn't everything.

            "I'm in love, Harry," said Tom.

            "**AGAIN?**  Tom, you need to understand something.  You're NOT in love.  We've been down this road before, and you've just made another crush, probably another unreachable one!  Oh god Tom, not again!  Why did you drag me into this **again**?  It's so ruddy annoying, and . . ."

            Harry stopped at the look on Tom's face.

            "Are you done yet?"

            "I guess I am, but . . . who is it this time?"

            Tom fell back onto Harry's couch and put his head in his hands.

            "That bad?"

            "Worse," said Tom

            "**Who is it**, Tom?"

            Tom made a muffled noise.

            "I'm sorry, could you please repeat that?"

            "B'Elanna," said Tom quietly.

            "**B'ELANNA**?" yelled Harry.

            "Don't yell it, Harry!"

            "B'Elanna?" asked Harry, quieter, but shocked skepticism still evident in his voice.

            "Yeah, B'Elanna," muttered Tom.

            "But Tom . . . why?"

            "I dunno," said Tom miserably.

            "B'Elanna," Harry repeated.

            "B'Elanna," Tom confirmed.

            "As in, feisty half-Klingon engineer?"

            "How many B'Elannas do you **know**, Harry?"

            "Tom."

            "What?"

            "You can't let this happen to us," said Harry.  "I mean, B'Elanna's my **friend**.  I can't just get involved in your impossible plans to court her!  She'll never forgive me.  And don't give me that innocent look, Tom, I know exactly what you were thinking.  How about you 'fall in love' with Sue Nicoletti again, hmm?  I know she was hard, but she'll be a **breeze **compared to B'Elanna!  Why do you always go for the hard ones, anyway, Tom?"

            "I dunno," said Tom.  "I just do."

            They both sat in miserable silence.

            "So," said Tom.  "Are you gonna help me?"

            "Yeah," said Harry.  "I suppose I'll have to."


	2. In The Mess Hall

Harryitis 

Chapter 2

By starstruck

"Harry!" said Tom, running to catch up with him.

Harry inwardly groaned.  After his brief moment of stupidity in his quarters, where he had agreed to help Tom court B'Elanna, he had been avoiding Tom like the plague.

Deep down, he had known it wouldn't last.

"Have you eaten lunch, yet?" asked Tom, jogging beside him.

"No," said Harry instinctively.

"Come on, then," said Tom.

"Coming," said Harry, with a fake smile pasted on his face.

Mentally, Harry smacked himself.  Tom was his best friend, and he really was a great guy, but most people avoided him during his little obsessive crushes.

Harry didn't seem to have that ability.  Somehow, he always got sucked into it.

"Harry, Tom!" said Neelix enthusiastically as they entered the mess hall.

"Neelix," said Tom.

"I know you two will want to try my pleeka rind casserole," said Neelix, grinning happily.  "It's a new recipie.  I know you'll love it!"

"Yeah, sure, Neelix," said Tom amicably.

The artificial smile on Harry's face grew a couple sizes.

Neelix handed them two plates of colorless glop.

Harry headed for the nearest two-person table.

Tom, on the other hand, headed across the entire mess hall for the only remaining table with three seats.  Harry groaned and followed him, carefully sitting next to Tom so B'Elanna wouldn't have the chance.

Of course, maybe they weren't waiting for B'Elanna.  Maybe Tom just liked the stars.  Yes, that must be it.  Tom wanted to sit by the stars.  

"She'll be here in a minute," said Tom.

Or not.

Maybe Tom was waiting for someone else.  Yes – that had to be it.  Tom had never said B'Elanna would be here in a minute.  He just said she.  Harry was assuming.  Maybe – maybe Tom was already over B'Elanna, and Harry had nothing to worry about.

"Yeech," said Tom, putting on his disgusted face after tasting the pleeka rind casserole.

Harry sighed and dug his fork in, bringing it to his mouth.

"Hey," said Harry, "this isn't actually that bad."

Tom stared at him incredulously.

"You're kidding, right, buddy?"

"No," said Harry, taking another bite.  "I think it's delicious."

"I think you need to get your tastebuds checked," said Tom.

Harry grinned.

Okay, so this wasn't turning out so bad after all.

Tom started going on about some twentieth century movie, and Harry half-listened while he munched his pleeka rind casserole happily.

All of a sudden, Tom froze.

"Harry," he moaned quietly.

"What?" said Harry, around his mouthful of pleeka rind casserole.

"She's here," said Tom.

Harry turned around.

B'Elanna waved at him.

Harry groaned.


	3. Sickening

Harryitis 

Part 3

By starstruck

Disclaimer: See Part One.

Author's Note: I was thinking about it . . . and I decided that I'm going to stretch this story for most of the third season until Day Of Honor.  So it's going to be a long ride . . . just to warn you.

  
**

                       B'Elanna was decidedly cheerful.

                       Most days, this would make Harry's day better.  After all, B'Elanna was his friend, and he liked it when she was happy.

                       Alright, if he was being completely honest, it wasn't just that – it was more that he didn't really like having to deal with a pissed engineer.  When B'Elanna was pissed, everything seemed to scatter in fright and stay out of her way.

                       Harry didn't seem able to stay out of her way.

                       He needed to learn to say no.

                       Today, B'Elanna was chipper and excited – why, Harry didn't know, but then, he never knew the _why _of B'Elanna's moods.

                       But today, Harry wished she was grumpy.

                       Harry stared at his food.

                       If B'Elanna were grumpy, then maybe Tom would decide that he **didn't **like her so much after all and give up.

                       Yes, give up.

                       That was what Tom needed to do.

                       But B'Elanna and Tom were talking animatedly, and Tom sounded blissful.

                       So much for giving up.

                       He should not have sit next to Tom – because B'Elanna and Tom seemed to prefer being across the table from each other.  It gave them the opportunity to talk to each other better.  Harry couldn't hear what they were saying.  It was just blah, blah, blah to him – words with no meaning to him.

                       Alright, maybe they did have a meaning to him.  It was just probably different from the intended meaning.

                       And he didn't understand why he had thought that it had been important to keep B'Elanna from sitting next to Tom.  It wouldn't limit their physical contact.

                       For all he knew, they were playing footsies under the table.

                       The thought made him distinctly sick to his stomach.

                       "Harry?" asked Tom suddenly.

                       Harry moaned.

                       "Starfleet?" asked B'Elanna.  "Are you okay?"

                       "No," said Harry, looking up at his two best friends, who were both looking at him with concern.  At least they weren't staring into each other's eyes.

                       He was getting paranoid.

                       "Are you sick?" asked Tom, in a funny, almost-but-not-quite-concerned voice.  Of course Tom wasn't quite concerned.  He knew what was going on.  He probably knew he was the cause of the sick feeling in Harry's stomach.

                       "Yes," said Harry.  "I think I'm going to go."

                       "To sickbay?" asked B'Elanna.

                       Tom was looking delighted at the prospect of Harry leaving, and Harry sent him a glare.

                       It wasn't fair.  He was giving all this up for Tom, and Tom just wanted him to go away.

                       "No," said Harry, picking up his plate.  "I'm going to get some more casserole."

                       "Uh, Harry," said B'Elanna.  "I don't think that such a good idea . . ."

                       "It's probably why you're sick," said Tom not-so-helpfully.  "You just warfed it up."

                       "I **wish**," said Harry, staring at Tom pointedly, "that it was just the casserole."

                       Tom gulped.

                       Harry felt slightly better.

                       It was a small victory, but he needed it desperately.

                       "Neelix," said Harry.  "I want some more pleeka rind casserole."

                       He put his plate in the talaxian's face.

                       "Hungry today, are we?" grinned Neelix.

                       Harry thought about that.

                       "Not really," said Harry.  "I just like it."

                       Neelix beamed.

                       "Really?"

                       "Yeah," said Harry.

                       Neelix gave him some more, doing a funny little dance at the time.

                       Harry thanked him and headed back to the table.

                       Both B'Elanna and Tom were staring at him like he had gone insane.

                       He had a feeling he had.

                       His friends watched soundlessly as he warfed up another serving of pleeka rind casserole.

                       He was scaring them, he knew.

                       They deserved it.


End file.
